Monday, January 11, 2010

Lessons in Beautiful

The media is evil. It preys on our insecurities, telling us we are too fat, we eat all the wrong things, our skin looks terrible, and our clothes are sooo last season. I realize it's a new year and slightly cliche to be working on creating a new me, but so many things have changed in my life in the last month that the best way I can deal with it, is to reevaluate myself and start over. Keeping what I like from before and improving what I can.

May I accept the things I cannot change, have the courage to change the things I can and have the wisdom to know the difference.

I have the power to change my mind and my body. I can meditate to work on clearing my mind, being more aware of myself and living in the present as well as figuring out what I want. I can reduce clutter both mental and physical. Meditation will help clear my mind, I need to practice daily (like learning the piano). All my stuff is currently in my mom's garage (or in my car). Moving is such a harsh reminder of how much stuff I own. It is also a reminder of how much stuff I own that I never use, or is worn out. To respect yourself is to take care of your appearance. It doesn't have to come from the media, it doesn't have to be expensive and it shouldn't be for anyone but yourself. It's funny how it is possible to get so focused on something in the future that you forget the present. Reading about meditation, trying to practice it, and reading articles in yoga journals, have been helping me a lot to realize that life is now. Life is how we will be in 2 years, life is not going to happen when you get through something. I spend a lot of time thinking 'After I get through this things will be better.' It's a toxic way to think. Pain is inevitable but suffering is optional - it stems from attachment. Attachment to thinking I can control anything other than myself. I cannot change the weather, I cannot change other people, I cannot change what happens to me or to other people. I can only change or control my response to what happens to and around me.

Tonight I will be hitting up my first yoga class (in a long time and with new inspiration for doing it). I will chronicle my yoga/meditation/beautification/wardrobe updating experience here as well. It may seem that I share too much at times, but I have never really understood keeping things to yourself because we are all human and go through experience and how do people learn? By sharing experiences. In tough times especially is when the heart can heal with the help of words of others' experiences (I love you mom!)

May I accept the things I cannot change, have the courage to change the things I can and have the wisdom to know the difference.

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